Let me start this well overdue blog by stating the obvious... It's a new year!!! In the grandest of all New Years traditions, I wanted to share my New Years resolution with you all. My hope is that by sharing this resolution, I will have some accountability in sticking with it. I resolve to make NO promises on a steady, consistent delivery of this blog! Phew! Those of you who know me will understand the difficult challenge this poses,(HAHA) but never fear, I am confident I can do it!! :-)
Well, now that that is out of the way, let's reminisce a bit... 2013 held its ups and downs, much like the years before. Something different did happen though. I haven't been able to put a finger on it or pin point exactly what it was, but through the course of 2013, I struggled with a lot about my life; things mostly centered around how it's felt like my life has stalled in many aspects like work, home, relationships, etc. None of these things in my life felt like they were in the right place, I felt completely off and just not me. It's been in the last few months I've come around to see me and who I am and how to be me. I've been less stressed and for the first time in what feels like practically a forever, I not only enjoyed the holidays, but I had a sense of excitement and joy and anticipation around them again. Now, don't assume I'm wearing rose colored glasses, there are certainly parts that just aren't what I thought they'd be by this point in my life, but that's the beauty in discovering how to be me... Those things that aren't what I thought they would be are still okay! They don't mean mean I've messed things up forever and they don't mean I've done something wrong or missed something huge on my life; they're just part if being me!
So, you want to know this wonderful secret, the epiphany which struck me and has been helping me see things differently? Pay close attention, this is going to shock you! I come to the conclusion that I'm doing a-okay! Wait, scratch that, I'm doing really well. I've spent so long looking at the things that seemed wrong - things like "okay God... I've been divorced for 7 years now... Why haven't I met someone?!" or “why does it feel like things are moving the wrong direction in my career??” these things are hard to face and though the feelings are real, the negative nature of them has hidden the positives in the situations. Yes, I’m still single; but I’m not alone. My family is there for me any and every time. And yes, I am single, but I’m not only surviving as a single mom of 2, I am thriving! I can look at my life over the last seven years and see that I have over come challenges and accomplished things some people – and a fair amount of “social norm” – would have said I couldn’t do. I can also look back over those seven years and will readily admit there are things I’ve accomplished that I don’t believe I ever would have tried to overcome if I hadn’t been in the position I was – being single and not having someone else to lean on to do the “heavy lifting” in my life. I am stronger, more confident and more capable because of it. And work? That was a hard one, for a long time. When I kept my focus on the things that seemed wrong and not as I felt they should be in regards to my career, I missed seeing my accomplishments and positive impact. I have learned so much in the last year, and I have accomplished so much – none of which I could have done if things were different.
Sure, this all sounds simple, but there is a twist. Yes, I choose to look at my life and where things are and accepting where I am and be okay with it; but I refuse to accept any permanence in what I see right now. The day I choose to accept that where I am is where I will always be is the day I’ve given up; and I won’t give up. Change is a constant, I am fully aware of this; so the question I ask is how can I accept and embrace change and whatever it may hold for my life if I am not willing to accept and embrace my life today, just as it is? Change is good – but it is not always easy and comfortable nor does it always look the way I think it should. If I can accept those things in change, why is it so hard to accept those things in the present? It’s silly to not to! Life is not always comfortable or easy nor does it always look the way I thing it should; the good news is, it will change!
Now that I am learning to see that things are good how they are, and that change is always on the horizon, i can understand that I get to just be me. Not the me that should be dating or in a relationship or the me that should be further along in my career and not even the me that should be super mom; just the me who woke up this morning with the goal to accept this is my life right now and change is always in the mix. So with that new me in mind, the first issue I am publicly resolving is my complete failure to deliver a great blog on a regular basis! I write when I am inspired to, when the words just leap from my thoughts to the keyboard. The beauty in this process is it cannot be forced, and when it is forced the joy in writing is lost. What will you resolve today?!
(PS: for a great article about shaking this obsession over needing to be super mom, check out this article: http://www.modernmom.com/53a7b8b4-3b45-11e3-8407-bc764e04a41e.html)
Well, now that that is out of the way, let's reminisce a bit... 2013 held its ups and downs, much like the years before. Something different did happen though. I haven't been able to put a finger on it or pin point exactly what it was, but through the course of 2013, I struggled with a lot about my life; things mostly centered around how it's felt like my life has stalled in many aspects like work, home, relationships, etc. None of these things in my life felt like they were in the right place, I felt completely off and just not me. It's been in the last few months I've come around to see me and who I am and how to be me. I've been less stressed and for the first time in what feels like practically a forever, I not only enjoyed the holidays, but I had a sense of excitement and joy and anticipation around them again. Now, don't assume I'm wearing rose colored glasses, there are certainly parts that just aren't what I thought they'd be by this point in my life, but that's the beauty in discovering how to be me... Those things that aren't what I thought they would be are still okay! They don't mean mean I've messed things up forever and they don't mean I've done something wrong or missed something huge on my life; they're just part if being me!
So, you want to know this wonderful secret, the epiphany which struck me and has been helping me see things differently? Pay close attention, this is going to shock you! I come to the conclusion that I'm doing a-okay! Wait, scratch that, I'm doing really well. I've spent so long looking at the things that seemed wrong - things like "okay God... I've been divorced for 7 years now... Why haven't I met someone?!" or “why does it feel like things are moving the wrong direction in my career??” these things are hard to face and though the feelings are real, the negative nature of them has hidden the positives in the situations. Yes, I’m still single; but I’m not alone. My family is there for me any and every time. And yes, I am single, but I’m not only surviving as a single mom of 2, I am thriving! I can look at my life over the last seven years and see that I have over come challenges and accomplished things some people – and a fair amount of “social norm” – would have said I couldn’t do. I can also look back over those seven years and will readily admit there are things I’ve accomplished that I don’t believe I ever would have tried to overcome if I hadn’t been in the position I was – being single and not having someone else to lean on to do the “heavy lifting” in my life. I am stronger, more confident and more capable because of it. And work? That was a hard one, for a long time. When I kept my focus on the things that seemed wrong and not as I felt they should be in regards to my career, I missed seeing my accomplishments and positive impact. I have learned so much in the last year, and I have accomplished so much – none of which I could have done if things were different.
Sure, this all sounds simple, but there is a twist. Yes, I choose to look at my life and where things are and accepting where I am and be okay with it; but I refuse to accept any permanence in what I see right now. The day I choose to accept that where I am is where I will always be is the day I’ve given up; and I won’t give up. Change is a constant, I am fully aware of this; so the question I ask is how can I accept and embrace change and whatever it may hold for my life if I am not willing to accept and embrace my life today, just as it is? Change is good – but it is not always easy and comfortable nor does it always look the way I think it should. If I can accept those things in change, why is it so hard to accept those things in the present? It’s silly to not to! Life is not always comfortable or easy nor does it always look the way I thing it should; the good news is, it will change!
Now that I am learning to see that things are good how they are, and that change is always on the horizon, i can understand that I get to just be me. Not the me that should be dating or in a relationship or the me that should be further along in my career and not even the me that should be super mom; just the me who woke up this morning with the goal to accept this is my life right now and change is always in the mix. So with that new me in mind, the first issue I am publicly resolving is my complete failure to deliver a great blog on a regular basis! I write when I am inspired to, when the words just leap from my thoughts to the keyboard. The beauty in this process is it cannot be forced, and when it is forced the joy in writing is lost. What will you resolve today?!
(PS: for a great article about shaking this obsession over needing to be super mom, check out this article: http://www.modernmom.com/53a7b8b4-3b45-11e3-8407-bc764e04a41e.html)
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